My Authors of the Month are truly a diamond in the rough. They’re genuine, unique, and authentic. A married couple whose love shines through and resonates when interacting with their readers. I’m so honored to present this month’s featured Authors…NJ Cole and Oliver Durant!
Interview Questions for Oliver Durant & NJ Cole
How did you become involved with the Lifestyle of BDSM?
NJ: I’d fantasized about bondage for as far back as I can remember. We went to a club with a friend. Most of what we do now, we learned by watching others at the club or from taking classes. We take an idea that we see and then make it our own.
Oliver: It was NJ. She was role playing and then we got more into it. We evolved from there.
Were you both Authors before you adapted the lifestyle?
I was writing before I became active in the lifestyle in public ways. Oliver has always listened to me bounce story ideas off of him, but it wasn’t until The Other End of the Leash that he became actively involved with the writing.
Is it hard to separate your regular life from the BDSM lifestyle?
Oliver: We both have to be in charge at our jobs so we can’t live the lifestyle 24/7. When we go play, then we can live it.
NJ: I don’t think it is. It’s like when you have a work self and a home self.
A quiet evening in or a night out on the town?
Oliver: We enjoy both, but we enjoy more quiet nights in.
NJ: We stay in most nights, but when we go out, we go out!
What is your goal when writing a book?
NJ: To get the voices out of my head! LOL I want to tell the story as authentically as I can as I see it playing out in my head. Oliver keeps me going and grounds me and adds the male/Dom perspective to round out the book.
Oliver: To make a good authentic story. I want anything BDSM related to be as real as possible.
What is the biggest misconception about the BDSM lifestyle?
Oliver: That it’s all about communication, that the Dom is not the only one with power and control. It’s all about both people finding common ground. The submissive has to gift her submission. It’s not pressured, it’s given.
NJ: I think people confuse swinging with BDSM. There are many swingers who practice BDSM and many people who practice BDSM who are swingers, but not all. Probably, not even half. Most of the couples we know who enjoy BDSM only play with each other. There are a few who do scenes with other people, for example someone might ask Oliver to do a fire scene with them, but it isn’t sexual in nature. People need to realize that just because you submit to someone, you don’t necessarily sleep with them. In fact, I have a friend who never sleeps with anyone she submits to.
Aged liquor or aged wine?
NJ: Well recently we went on vacation and discovered that we like moonshine. (the flavored ones) Usually we prefer wine. We like to go to wineries and try different ones. I love moscato.
What is your life motto/quote?
Oliver: “Let’s try it. What could go wrong?”
If you could have a movie made about your lives, who do you see playing each other?
NJ: I am positive Oliver would want Jennifer Aniston playing me. I’ll let him answer on who he thinks I’d want to play him. I’d hope there was a pirate theme!
Oliver: Johnny Depp or Sean Connery.
Where/What do you draw the most inspiration from?
Oliver: The voices in NJ’s head. Sometimes we will be talking and she’ll just stare off and then grab out her phone and start taking notes as fast as she can.
NJ: The stories just pop into my head. I can’t possibly write them all, so I write the story of the person who talks the loudest. It’s funny because in The Other End of the Leash, Raven didn’t talk to me until we were about half way finished with the book. It was all Kade, and ironically Kennedy feeding me second hand information until I could figure out how to hear Raven’s side. You probably noticed that her chapters were short and disjointed. That’s all I got from her in the beginning.
Have you ever clashed when co-authoring a book?
NJ: Oliver and I don’t really clash. We work out the story and it usually can only go one way. Even when we think we have a choice about something, by the time we’re done writing, it turns out it had to be one way or the other for the story to work. For us, the big decisions are how much to share. Do we write out three pages on them making dinner and what they had or do we just say, “We made dinner and ate.” Sometimes one works better than the other.
As far as other authors go, I’ve written books with 3 others. All three are extremely talented. Look for another book from Jax and I this summer. Fossbrook and I are currently writing a series. I know you’re all going to love them.
What comes first, the plot or the characters? Which is most important?
Oliver: I would say the story. NJ tends to think of a plot and then the characters seem to follow.
NJ: I can’t tell the difference. I actually sat here and asked Oliver to explain the question to me. They go so hand in hand for me, I’m not sure I could separate. It’s like asking which is more important, your heart or your brain.
Describe your writing space?
NJ: It’s wherever my laptop is, unless I am writing on my phone. If there was one space, it would be a recliner in the living room. It’s where I sit the most. (recently we worked on our book in the car on our 9 hour car ride)
What do you both like to do when you’re not writing, hobbies/pastimes?
NJ: I like doing mindless things. I do that 3-D diamond thing, painting, playing really boring games on my phone and watching TV. It’s a brain decompress for me. I tend to overthink everything, and I’m always writing in my head. I’ve found that if I’m playing a memory type game, like a cooking game on my phone, I can’t think of writing at that time and it gives my brain a break. Doing math problems works too.
Oliver: I like playing softball, working out, watching TV, and talking to people on Facebook.
What do you want your readers to walk away with when they finish your work?
NJ: I want them to feel what the characters feel. I want them to get the story and have their hearts love and hurt just like mine does while being immersed in the book.
Finally, what personal message do you have for your readers?
Oliver: Be yourself. And if you are going to try the lifestyle, take your time. Don’t dive in. If it doesn’t feel right, trust your gut.
NJ: For me, writing is a way to communicate. I like to have others communicate with me. I’d love to hear what you think about the stories, the characters and especially, I’d love to hear about you and your journey. Please, if you want, take a moment to send me a PM 🙂